This is some tricky territory Too many roads for me to walk Wears down my bones but they‘re not broken ‘Cause I‘ve got some plans for where I‘m going Someone is twisting my right arm behind my back And yanking them a-left
Lately I’ve been thinking about what roads we’re all walking. And it’s a little funny how we got to where we are, and if anything the universe has a perverse sense of humor. I am trying to stop analyzing why things are the way they are (because honestly sometimes I can’t quiet the thoughts in my head), and just be grateful of what I have and get to do.
And I have this dream where I’m screamin’ underwater While my friends are wavin’ from the shore And I don’t need you to tell me what that means I don’t believe in that stuff anymore
I need to get my head out of bad outcomes. It’s not healthy, and I can’t live in the worst case scenario. But it’s difficult not to when unthinkable things have happened when you think it was just another day. Unplanned phone calls terrify me, and the first thought that comes to me is always “Who died?” because there were at some points, and those you didn’t prepare for. So let me be wrong. Let this be scarring from past phone calls and something I can work through with my therapist. -J
I didn’t mean to pick a fight But, oh well, note to self Four pints in, you’re someone else
If you can’t see my mirrors Then I can’t see you
This week kept going and going in ways that made me just want to stay under the sheets and bother my rabbit. And it’s not over yet. When does being a grownup get easier? -J
Lately, when faced with silence, my head plays the bars of this song. Loudly. Over and over.
You start a conversation you can’t even finish it You’re talkin’ a lot, but you’re not sayin’ anything When I have nothing to say, my lips are sealed Say something once, why say it again?
